A Big Dreamer

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Losing someone who meant the whole world to you isn't as easy as how it seems. At some point, you think that you are able to go on with life without them but at another point of your life, you miss them so terrible that you wish you could rewind back the time.

I'm moving on slowly. Sometimes I'm strong, sometimes I'm not. I'm just human. I still think of you every now and then. Would you think of me too? Sometimes I think this is unfair. A girl like me don't deserve this. BUT on a higher note, everything happens for a reason. I don't know how you feel out there.

Life sure does going to be different after this. Back then, we used to do everything together. Just name it, been there and done that. Shop, Study, Cry, Laugh, Angry..anything. It feels like I have lost a bestfriend now. No one to talk to, no one to share with, no one to laugh with. I feel awkward and weird. I feel strange because everything is completely different now. I've lost a person who is like a bestfriend to me & I'm definitely tearing while typing this * wiping off my tears. Now I'm wondering, what are you doing out there? Are you thinking of me like how I am thinking of you? Hmmmmm...it's just weird, very weird.

I know I can't depend on you anymore. Because if I do, I'm just going to hurt myself more. If we ever befriend with each other again, things are not going to be the same. The laughter we used to share is not the same, definitely. Feelings fade. Are yours fading? Each time I take out my handphone to text you, I'll end up not texting you and each time I dial your number, I'll end up hanging up. Because I am afraid. I am so afraid now..afraid of falling in love.

And oh, if you are reading this..I hope you are doing good out there. :) I'm sure you are still stressing up about your bike license. Once you're done with it, you are freeeeeeeee! hahaha. I hope life's been very good to you. Even if it's not, I know you are strong. Work hard, study hard. :)

Alrights, for now, I am thinking of keeping myself busy. And I mean, VERY BUSY! Cousin Ulfah has been begging me to come back and tutor her. Well, I have saturday and sunday. I am thinking of tutoring her on saturday and sunday. Besides, I really have no plan on weekends. So lets see.. mon (training), tuesday (tutoring), wednesday (training), thursday (tutoring), friday (training), saturday (tutoring), sunday (tutoring). SUPERB!!!!! I can still have time for my studies. :):):) Ok go ahhh! This is going to be my schedule till god knows when. :D Yes, it's going to be damn hectic but this is the only way for me to move on and not feel so sad and stress up. The more I keep myself busy, the lesser I feel sad. I hope. :) haisss.... ok ok. Don't whineee...not good! Must smile moreeeee :):):):):)

"Why does my heart hurt so much. It's feels like it has been ripped off."

I miss those blue eyes

How you kiss me at night

I miss the way we sleep,

Like there's no sunrise

Like the taste of your smile

I miss the way we breathe

But I never told you

What I should have said

No I never told you,

I just held it in

And now, I miss everything about you

Can't believe that I still want you

And after all the things we've been through

I miss everything about you, without you...

I see your blue eyes

Everytime I close mine

You make it hard to see

Where I belong to

When I'm not around you

It's like I'm alone with me....

4:57 AM
Yours truly.

<>
	Sunday, July 18, 2010 Losing someone who meant the whole world to you isn't as easy as how it seems. At some point, you think that you are able to go on with life without them but at another point of your life, you miss them so terrible that you wish you could rewind back the time. I'm moving on slowly. Sometimes I'm strong, sometimes I'm not. I'm just human. I still think of you every now and then. Would you think of me too? Sometimes I think this is unfair. A girl like me don't deserve this. BUT on a higher note, everything happens for a reason. I don't know how you feel out there. Life sure does going to be different after this. Back then, we used to do everything together. Just name it, been there and done that. Shop, Study, Cry, Laugh, Angry..anything. It feels like I have lost a bestfriend now. No one to talk to, no one to share with, no one to laugh with. I feel awkward and weird. I feel strange because everything is completely different now. I've lost a person who is like a bestfriend to me & I'm definitely tearing while typing this * wiping off my tears. Now I'm wondering, what are you doing out there? Are you thinking of me like how I am thinking of you? Hmmmmm...it's just weird, very weird. I know I can't depend on you anymore. Because if I do, I'm just going to hurt myself more. If we ever befriend with each other again, things are not going to be the same. The laughter we used to share is not the same, definitely. Feelings fade. Are yours fading? Each time I take out my handphone to text you, I'll end up not texting you and each time I dial your number, I'll end up hanging up. Because I am afraid. I am so afraid now..afraid of falling in love. And oh, if you are reading this..I hope you are doing good out there. :) I'm sure you are still stressing up about your bike license. Once you're done with it, you are freeeeeeeee! hahaha. I hope life's been very good to you. Even if it's not, I know you are strong. Work hard, study hard. :) Alrights, for now, I am thinking of keeping myself busy. And I mean, VERY BUSY! Cousin Ulfah has been begging me to come back and tutor her. Well, I have saturday and sunday. I am thinking of tutoring her on saturday and sunday. Besides, I really have no plan on weekends. So lets see.. mon (training), tuesday (tutoring), wednesday (training), thursday (tutoring), friday (training), saturday (tutoring), sunday (tutoring). SUPERB!!!!! I can still have time for my studies. :):):) Ok go ahhh! This is going to be my schedule till god knows when. :D Yes, it's going to be damn hectic but this is the only way for me to move on and not feel so sad and stress up. The more I keep myself busy, the lesser I feel sad. I hope. :) haisss.... ok ok. Don't whineee...not good! Must smile moreeeee :):):):):) "Why does my heart hurt so much. It's feels like it has been ripped off." I miss those blue eyes How you kiss me at night I miss the way we sleep, Like there's no sunrise Like the taste of your smile I miss the way we breathe But I never told you What I should have said No I never told you, I just held it in And now, I miss everything about you Can't believe that I still want you And after all the things we've been through I miss everything about you, without you... I see your blue eyes Everytime I close mine You make it hard to see Where I belong to When I'm not around you It's like I'm alone with me.... 4:57 AM Yours truly.	Yours Truly Syahirah. 18. Republic Poly. Pharmaceutical Science. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day. And oh, don't forget to fly. Music Playlist at MixPod.com Click please Links Beads&Ribbons Gf Raudhah Gf Nadz Gf Izzi Gf Leeyan Gf Sasha Gf Anisah Zelah Mr Ng Fatin kidd Andy ShaSha Hasnim Hazirah Lala Parker Sissy Syuu Abg Isk Afiq Heedayah Hyraah Shasha Rockstar Atiqah kasha amira rp daniel rp Syahidah rp Syuee rp Salim rp Nadhirah chiron Atikah chiron Shaihah chiron Nazahah chiron Alif Hakim dhilah sue rp luqman hakim tiqsy Nizzam Abby Ulfah Jolene Aishah Archives May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 Credits Biggest credit: the bikini boy Editor: JollyPills/:B